A few years ago, Destiny’s Child had a song called “Independent Woman”. Here are some of the lyrics…
The shoes on my feet I’ve bought it The clothes I’m wearing I’ve bought it The rock I’m rocking I bought it Cause I depend on me (If I want it) The watch I’m wearing I bought it The house I live in I’ve bought it The car I’m driving I’ve bought it I depend on me (I depend on me) All the women, who are independent Throw your hands up at me All the honeys, who making money Throw your hands up at me All the mommas, who profit dollars Throw your hands up at me All the ladies, who truly feel me Throw your hands up at me
The song has a great beat! When I first heard it, I thought now if they can do all that for themselves, they would not need a man or God.
I admit that I have a self-reliant spirit. I realize that I can make my own money, and I can spend it like I want, but I decided to share my life with two people. One who is my Creator and the other is my lover and husband.
I am convinced that God created marriage to teach us collaboration. He also wants us to collaborate with Him, whether we are single or married. I know I can do most things by myself. However, I don’t want to.
During the first year of my marriage, I was accustomed to taking my car to the mechanic and dealing with it on my own. So, imagine me coming home complaining about the car and my husband asking, “Why didn’t you call me?” I stood in silence. I had no answer. He was hurt that I would make a major financial decision without consulting him.
Now I have a wicked sense of humor. I actually started laughing at myself. I honestly had forgot I had a loving husband who would want to work with me on this. I have been doing this on my own so long that it didn’t occur to me to call him.
I realized that I needed God’s help to learn how to work with my collaborators. When I sat down to pray about it, the Holy Spirit said to me “You have always brought me the big problems, but you think you can handle everything else. I want all of it”. I was stunned. I realized my self-reliance had kept me from giving God everything.
How can we ask God to work it out for us, and then try to work it out ourselves? We pray about it and then worry and try to come up with our own solution, instead of allowing Him to provide a solution.
From that day forward, I have made it a daily practice to sit and talk to my collaborators. I have learned to talk to God about everything. I learned to trust my husband’s opinion and judgment. Do we always agree? No. However, God is the tiebreaker. There have been times, when we have both been wrong and our Father in heaven has reminded us. My husband and I do not make any decisions without consulting our collaborator. We had to learn how to share our lives. Lesson learned.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:16 KJV
Are we learning to depend on God? What have you learned about dependence on God? Share your thoughts.